The profound energy of love

Awash with a wave of love gifted by an ascended master he sits as his vibration raises higher than he ever thought possible.
In less than moment he drops a single tear, as it rolls down his cheek he witnesses the profound energy of love.

As it vibrates his very being he knows right down to his soul, that at his core he is only love.
With this gift glowing in his heart, he feels a warmth that will always stay with him, it energises his whole body, every cell is alive; he has been touched by pure love.
He smiles gently with the knowing that with this love in his heart he will always be safe for this love is the only love there is and the partnership is eternal.

The Sun and The Moon from the Stars that are three.
We will always be as one.

Stuart Smith © 2014

Goodbye Kisses

I sit here and I miss you, oh just to kiss you.
On your lips.
I smile away the day, with every thing you say.
My heart drips.

When in times of trouble, or caught up in a bubble.
Please decide.
That if you love your self, you’ll have more than wealth.
By your side.

So we all just take our hands, and walk across the lands.
Peace in our hearts.
Free of ego and war, food for all we saw.
For just a start.

People found it rather funny, the concept of money.
More for some?
Resources gained where shared, plenty was there.
No tanks and guns.

To start this process now, we have to somehow.
Change our ways.
Surrender to the now, for it has special powers.
To amaze.

Live in the moment, for life is only now.
Feel the love.
Awaken from your trance, feel the freedom dance.
Become one.

Divinely I don’t grumble, for my spirit lessons rumble.
Through my mind.
From the stars we travel far, just to find out who we are.
There our no goodbye kisses for our kind.

By Stuart Smith © 2013


Sometimes in life!

Sometimes in life, you have to grow beyond your wildest imaginings.

It often takes great sorrow and misery to finally realise your true potential, to live your dreams, to create a joyous reality not only because you want it, but out of necessity.

I have found that by living your truth, being the real you, gives you a greater acceptance of you, the inner strength and courage to love your self first, as without first loving your self how can one expect anyone else to.

Do not feel selfish for thinking of you first, it is not about not caring for others or not being compassionate, it is about being true to your self and then by doing so you can be true to others, aiding them in their healing and their growth.

If you are flying through clouded skies, long for kisses that hold no lies.
Are wanten for Human touch, a love that yearns, a love that grows.
Seeds that spawn almighty trees, pathways that feel the breeze.
First speak with that inner child, hold them close for a while.
Tell your self that it’s okay, don’t be afraid to cry all day.

Reach out with your heart, it is okay to start again.
It is okay to not pretend, that everything is fine.
I like fine wine, need time to restore the natural chemical balance.
To sit and wait for the time to come, when you’re enjoyed by all and one.

Once you are happy with you, there is no way that you’ll be glued.
To old thoughts, behaviours that have become you.
Your higher self doth know you, listen to your inner voice.
It will give you an honest choice.

It’s up to you to be the best you can, a better woman, a better man.
So take a walk, a walk with me, lets find out our destiny.
Lets hold hands and dance and sing, write, prance, try new things.
Play, laugh blow bubbles, who cares if it gets you in trouble.

To be you is all you should strive for.
Open the doorway to your soul.
It is the only way that you can grow.
And now I long, for heart-felt love.

And angels speak from high above.
They speak of aeons past.
They speak of love that will always last.
They speak these words to me, so self I heal and wait for thee.

Blessed be, Stuart.

Look Deep

So true, love of another is the ultimate giving that a Human can experience, in doing so we receive a perfect gift to be cherished and never let go of.

My heart is still aching

Love heart uidaodjsdsew

Guitar chords G / G major 7th / D / D major 7th / C / D

G                            GMJ7      D                   DMJ7
My heart is still aching, I don’t know what to write.
C                                D
Does it still exist? Is there anything left inside?
G                     GMJ7        D                       DMJ7
I can’t feel it beating, it used to beat like a drum.
C                                    D                          
All I can say is now, it doesn’t want to run.

Bedroom antics may have been the cause, I was simply far too blind.
To notice you slip away, was you only trying to hide?
But now our love is stronger, it’s all up to me they say.
To forgive you and my self, but I’m stuck in yesterday.

I know I must have hurt you, for you to do the things you’ve done.
But instead of holding you real close, I simply let you run.
The love I feel for you, is something I can’t hide.
It’s high up above the clouds, where angels reside.

Now that we are parted, although only for a while.
Hearing you when you call me, always makes me smile.
Forgiveness is in my soul, but torments in my mind.
How do I forgive you darling, when there’s torture in my eyes.

The only thing that keeps me going, is you and the kids.
I’m going to pin that thought promptly, to the back of my eye lids.
I’ve jump started my heart again, solely for you.
But please don’t ever shake it, coz it’s only held with glue.

I know that you can feel me, from across the shores.
When I wake up in the mornings, it is you that I adore.
I feel our love is beautiful, like a flower in full bloom.
Worry not my darling, I’ll be coming home real soon.

I’ll be coming home real soon, to oo ooo sooth you.

By Stuart Otway-Smith Registered & Protected

I miss you all my love, kiss our children for me and hug baby.


Dr. Phil Explains How to Trust Again After an Affair

When Jamie found out his wife Jody had been unfaithful, he told Dr. Phil and Oprah that his heart had hardened toward her. Could he learn to trust again? Watch as Dr. Phil redefines trust in a marriage and explains why you have to learn to trust yourself first.

Read more:

I love you, I love You; I Love YOU!

I love you, I love You; I love YOU!

But what does it mean?

love | ləv | noun

1 An intense feeling of deep affection:
Babies fill parents with intense feelings of love
Their love for their country.

A deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone:
It was love at first sight.
They were both in love with her.
We were slowly falling in love .

( Love ) A personified figure of love, often represented as Cupid.

A great interest and pleasure in something:
His love for football.
We share a love of music.

Affectionate greetings conveyed to someone on one’s behalf.
A formula for ending an affectionate letter:
Take care, lots of love, Stu.

2 A person or thing that one loves:
She was the love of his life
Their two great loves are tobacco and whiskey.

Great! We have a clinical description, but how does it feel?
Hmm, I’m a man, what do I know about love? Right?

Lets explore and find out…

I realised something whilst attempting to have a bath today, that made me pop out of it ASAP and hit my keyboard, this blogging’s getting infectious!

I ponder on lots of things, this ones lovingly constructive 😉

When you say; I love you!

Usually with a passing glance you say those words as a gesture of goodwill and companionship, they can even become a chore in certain circumstances unfortunately.

Such as:  After a lovers tif you humbly mumble, I love you under your breath, then proceed to slam the door shut and leave the building.

A response is expected but not always warranted or required.

Such as: See you later, I love you, as you hang up the phone.
Make the effort to mean it if you do say it, if not perhaps ask your self, am I even in love at all?

Upon receiving a response, you feel a comfort, a harmonious joy, that you are loved and cared for, hopefully the feelings mutual.

And that’s usually it my friends, however!

Do we all not want a deeper understanding of love?
Well, today, I was lucky enough to receive one.

Shell gave me a gift today, I shall treasure it for life and share with whom ever is listening.

Shell said; I love, I love you, I love you repeatedly, over and over again, each time she said it, I could feel it more, her voice became more gentle, genuine, compassionate, our eyes met, then pulled together like magnets, we gazed into each others eyes, I began to hang on every word, we kissed lips softly, our breath began to quicken.

This was my conclusion, the first time that you tell someone whom you love, I love you, your expectant, once they respond, you move to admiration and soon affection.

You are both now really paying attention to each other, “kick him off the TV”, looking into each others eyes, emotions start to form.

At this stage your ready to listen to them completely and are almost ‘under their spell‘.

Your probably feeling sensual and erotic right now, I know I was.

By repeatedly telling someone very close to you that you love them, you will find that each time you say it, a deeper, more passionate and stronger message will come across.

I am certain that repeatedly telling your partner, relative or dear friend that you love them today will get you the attention you require of them and make them feel wonderful in the process.

So go on, really tell someone you love them, by loving them as you say it, by saying it over and over.

Us Humans rely on multiple stimuli to process the world, so use what you have to spread your message of love, don’t waste it by tossing it from across the room, get in close, face them, hold their hands, let them know how much you love them by saying it repeatedly and with good intention.

Love you, Stu.

Day Fiftysix:

I woke up this morning about 8:50 alert and standing fully to attention, so to speak.

I had awoken to a smile as sweat as candy floss.

The day started out sunny, Shell made a massive effort and were not even out of bed yet, don’t give up, it’s working, although you may think otherwise.

As I rolled over completely, Shell stirred, smiled at me and told me she loved me repeatedly, please do this more often my love it’s so meaningful to me, this will make these problems lesson more hastily don’t stop!

We caressed each other for a while , began to kiss softly, we rubbed noses then became entangled.

As I started to make love to her I could feel my self-control gently drifting away.
We made love for half an hour or so before I suddenly stopped without finishing!
Collapsing atop of her, I began snivelling all over her, I gripped her tightly as to never let her go.

A real passion killer I can tell you, I got up lowly, went downstairs then sat on my own crying once again, everyone around me says, move on, let it go, I know, I know, I know…

But in the situation above how do you just move on?

I ended up sexually frustrated, resentful and bitter, it goes without saying that when you’re in an emotional state such as this, you are not the happiest person to be around, it’s not a good idea right now to try and have a civil conversation.

Again something wonderful, sensual and loving gets corrupted by my thoughts, like adverts with volume full, in my face they deliver their message, not with deliberation but cruel intent.

Even kissing you does not feel right, have you changed the way you kiss.
Is that how you kissed him? Or is it me?

I try so hard to just ignore the images and thoughts of deceit in my minds eye, but they keep playing peek a boo with my sub conscious whilst I sleep, day dream and ponder.
They haunt me when we make love, spectre’s spooking me back into reality.

How can I fix this?

The childish emo fits I have succumbed to daily for the last few days are ruining our chances to heal, it is Shell who now resents me, I still sit here, selfishly feeling sorry for my self.

I want to make love to you and feel you like I used to, I need to!

Your more than sexual meat I abuse for my own lustful pleasures, your are my love, my lover, my companion, partner, friend, the mother of our babies, everything about you makes me tingle, I must keep reminding myself of this continuously and never stop.

I don’t know how to begin explaining the complex emotions I am experiencing as I type this out, trying to tell you in words how much I love you is much harder than I imagined it to be.

For some reason my music is out of sync with yours, our rhythm out of time.
I wish the DJ of love would fix the broken beats in my heart and synchronise our rhythms once again

Your body is my body, my soul is your soul, our two hearts beat as one
I know with absolute certainty the rhythm of our hearts will never be out of sync.

I love you.

No matter what you’ve done

This is dedicated to our eldest daughter, whom since becoming a mother recently has suddenly become a beacon of shining light, an angel in the darkness, a person of honest compassion and loving kindness.

You bring so much joy and happiness to your Mum and I, even at such as distance.
Give baby a huge fluffy snuggle from us, we all miss you all so very much.

She sent me a message today and this came to mind so I wrote it down.

I’m so proud of her.

No matter what you’ve done.

I got a message today, from my daughter.
A memo that showed, all I’d taught her.
She said, spend time with the kids, and soon the baby
My Mum for heavens sakes, love her for ages.

Keep your chin up high, and stop moping.
Or her sister and her brother, would get lowly.
I know she doesn’t wan’t them, growing up.
With all the shit, in the back, of her garbage truck.

She continued to state, that a kiss and hug.
A kind spoken word, was just good enough.
Show a keen interest, in all that they do.
Then just like me, they’ll always love you!

It’s really a wonderful feeling.

When your baby gives advice that’s appealing.

You know that your job is good and done, 

When your child says; I love you Daddy!

No matter what you’ve done.

I got advice passed my way, from my eldest.
It’s not the first time at all, that I’ve heard this.
But coming from you, it makes all the difference.
I put your consultation, on top of my wish list.

I know sometimes what I write, it bothers you.
But sincerely I belay, my apology.
You’ve got your own family, to raise now.
Shouldn’t be worrying about, our break down.

If I could, I would gently rock and wake you.
From this nightmare, give you a hug and cradle.
I’m really very sorry, for the chat I type.
I hope that you forgive me, you made me smile tonight.

It’s really a wonderful feeling.

When your baby gives advice that’s appealing.

You know that your job is good and done, 

When your child says; I love you Daddy!

No matter what you’ve done.

I love you so very much my princess.

By Stuart Otway-Smith Registered & Protected

Day Fifityfive:

Restless sleep makes you really pissed off for the want of better words.

Im’ so tired…

I struggled to make a cup of coffee this morning and dropped my cup on the floor, it smashed to bits, then in a frivolous fury of frustration; I grabbed the coffee jar and slammed it into the floor, the glass shattered in all directions and the brown coffee granules ejected all over the room.

What a mess!


Shell has been off with me for days, I am really feeling the pressure of trying to be nice on the outside when you’re dying from within.

Maybe there is hope after all, Shell just sent me a text and usually I keep those things private but there are exceptions to the rule right?

She said:

I love you so very much, I feel your pain but don’t know how to take it away or how to comfort you.

I feel you are slipping away from me more each day and that scares me.

I try to hold you, Tell you I love you, I must find another way to bring you back to me.

That bond between us was like a rope that keeps pulling us back together, the rope has worn thin and frayed.

I must strengthen the rope and not let it break like string.

I know you feel our love is held together by cobwebs, but know that cobweb is one of the strongest materials known to us, if we keep puling on the rope together in the same direction we will be able to get closer to each other and tie a knot, rather than tormenting each other in a bitter tug of war.


I got a very special message from a very special person, no names sorry! They know who they are.

It said: (slightly modified for privacy)

I don’t blame you, I did not mind as I still read everything everyday , it seems like your depression is getting worse and I don’t want that for you. I know what Shell did was wrong and I can only imagine what you are feeling but look how far you have come over the past 16 years, you CAN get through this.

You both need to enjoy each other no matter how much it hurts at the moment.

I know you love Shell very much and I know she does make mistakes, trust me I’ve been through some of them with her too; I have to keep saying, think about the kids! Because it rubs off on them especially at the age they are at, I don’t want them to feel down too.

By what I’ve been told about Shells dates speaking to her, it sounds to me that the baby is defiantly yours, so forget about everything else and shut the world out, you and Shell have a baby on the way and your little family is all that matters now.

Go and hug her even if it hurts you and tell her you love her give her, a little positive note and say that you know that you can get through it.

Then I want you to go and hug the kids and tell them you love them and that your sorry for being down lately and that your going to change that.

You may not think it at the moment but they need you now more than ever trust me.
I don’t know what I would do without my Dad.

Please  just think to the future and not what has happened in the past, remember you can’t change that.

I love you Xxx

I hope you don’t mind me posting that message although modified ever so slightly as you know.

I love you to and thank you for caring and passing me a hand via words that I see with my eyes and feel in my heart.

I will do exactly as you suggest, today more than any other due to the tension it would make the biggest difference and liven up every bodies day, you really are a wonderful person and I am truly grateful and blessed to be apart of your life.

Thank you again for telling me just what I needed to hear, in such a sweet way.

It’s still early enough to finish the day off nicely.

As I finish this sentence the Sun has just yawned out loudly and appears in the garden gently erasing the rain clouds.


Although I am in a huge amount of pain and lethargy reminds me so, we have had a reasonable day today, it didn’t start to good with my mouth ranting despicable torment for a short while after the coffee incident. Since then we have started to get close again, closer than we have been for some days. I’m pleased for Shells message, a simple use of words to let me know she is hanging on to our relationship, I to will not let it go, I love you far too much to let it hang out to dry.

I guess this is apart of the process of healing from such pain.


I listen to Red Sky at Night from the album On An Island by David Gilmour and write how I feel.

Why is it every time I go out of my way to be divinely nice, treat Shell with the utmost respect that she deserves, make her happy by going out of my way to really love her, I screw it all up with my mouth?


I love you sweetheart, saying that now after what I just said to you makes the words feel dry.

I wish my mouth would just STFU and stay with the loving kindness, I truly feel in my heart and mind.

Why do I seem to have this primal urge to just rant at you randomly in a fit of rage and venom?

Please understand that what I say is a result of the bad images in my mind I do not mean any of it especially about the baby not being mine, what a horrible person I am, how dare I make you feel like that, especially when pregnant.

I want to rip my head off and hammer it to my arse as just as things got better I let rip at Shell making her whimper in tears.

I’m sorry for acting childish and immature, and saying all that rubbish to you and the fact the kids heard my outrage saddens me deeply.

Bad person I feel, Bad person I am, mistakes I have not learned from, but I am just a man.

I love you Shell with every part of my soul, life with you is my destiny, if only I would realise it.

I burned the rope you tossed me before I even had a chance to catch it this evening, please I’m begging you, throw me another one, I promise not to ever let it go.

It was me that caused the resentment and hate tonight not you, you have tried so hard and I thank you with all of my being.

Please forgive me, my love, as now I really need to learn to forgive myself for ventures past and failed memories.