Hello Mr. Ego

M4 money supply of the United Kingdom 1984–200...

Hello Mr. Ego, how are you today?
None of your business, you hear you self say.
Am I even bothered, do I really like you!
Of course I do, you say out loud, not polity.
But then again, poor me, another day.
It’s your fault, so you’re to blame.
My actions are your responsibility, your shame.
For I am better than you, please like me.
Contradict yourself, then bite me.
I’ll do anything for money, Mr. Ego says.
Chop down the trees, drugs for a sneeze.
Who cares about toxicities, in the sky.
So let all the pain go, rise up and we’ll grow.
They say horses for courses, we’ve got the resources.
To make sure that no being dies.
So not being funny, if we get rid of money.
Government propaganda and lies, that try to control us.
Can only be beaten, by love in abundance.
It’s in each and everyones eyes.
Together ascension is nigh.

 

 

~~~~~ The Invitation ~~~~~

~~~~~ The Invitation ~~~~~

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes!” It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children. It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here.

I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back. It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

~ by Oriah Mountain Dreamer ~

#OtwaySmith

Tag I’m it!

The last game of Tag I had was a few years ago, it was with the kids outside our house in Winklebury, there was a huge lawn outside and the kids where playing with water guns!

I was tagged by Currie Rose =P lol thanks XD
I thought you would appreciate this so this is for you.

A Red Currie Rose

A Red Currie Rose

RULES:

1. You must post the rules.
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post and then create eleven new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged.
3. Tag eleven people and link to them on your post.
4. Let them know you’ve tagged them!

The questions Currie Rose set for me.

  1. What is your favorite childhood memory? Going to Florida and having breakfast in the company of Mickey mouse with my mum dad and sister.
  2. If there is one thing you could change about yourself, what would it be and why? I would like to give my self the ability to finish what I start and be kinder, so that I achieve more and am a nicer person with more consideration.
  3. What is your favorite pastime, besides blogging of course? Playing guitar and listening to music.
  4. Where do you see yourself in 10 years? 46
  5. Do you like where you currently live? Why or why not? Yes it is homely and our landlord is great, new neighbours are a pain in the arse its to small and we are moving in a month or so to a larger property, this means the two kids won’t be sharing rooms any longer, YAY
  6. What is your biggest life goal? To own our own home that is environmentally friendly and self sufficient.
  7. What are 3 things you always carry with you? My heart, my sleeve and a shoulder to cry on.
  8. What is the one place you really want to visit? I really want to go back to Florida for a while, visit Richard Bandler for some NLP and then onto the Venus Project and of course I’d have to go to Disney World.
  9. Do you think the world is going to end in 2012? Only if my friends dog farts!
  10. What is your most embarrassing experience you are willing to share with the world? I once caught my willy in my zipper.
  11. What is your comfort food? Costa Coffee, Large Mocha Flake, Brie and Bacon Baguette, slice of Carrot Cake, OMG I am dribbling nom nom nom…

The eleven people I am tagging are in no particular order of preference, hugs!

  1. Maggie Mae For being the first blogger to follow me, and writing such heart felt poetry, I thank you.
  2. Wartica Thanks for being the first person to like one of my posts and giving me that little kick of confidence.
  3. stellamarr Does great work for rape victims and prostitution survivors.
  4. AMSDaily For providing wonderful positive insights.
  5. Risa Fibromyalgia, animals, mental health, Risa cares and works hard to help others she also lives with FM.
  6. Jodi Ambrose Your genuine, compassionate, humorous, flirtatious and a wonderful author, thanks for the giggles.
  7. 400 Days Till 40 This blogger writes fantastically optimistic and inspirational posts about life and nature.
  8. Photo Botos Wonderfully beautiful and stunning photography of the world around us and everything in it.
  9. The Change Your Life Blog Thanks Stuart for your passionate, inspiring and uplifting posts.
  10. Sending Joy Spirit Healer is a spiritual and loving Human with genuine loving kindness in her heart.
  11. zen and the art of borderline maintenance Last and certainly not least, thank you for your kindness wisdom and support, Hope your site move has Zen, Namaste.
The eleven questions I ask you to answer.
  1. What is your favourite colour?
  2. What do you find relaxing?
  3. Have you heard of Solfeggio Harmonics? and if not would you investigate?
  4. Are you environmentally friendly?
  5. If you could change one thing about your self what would it be? and Why?
  6. Do you think helping others is beneficial to society?
  7. If you could would you stop the use of money?
  8. Do you grow your own food?
  9. Have you got any pets?
  10. Are you living life to it’s fullest?
  11. Do you spread happiness and joy each and every day?

MY RULES

Nothing major, lets keep it simple and use Currie Rose rules above with the addition of.

I would like each of these people to find one post on each of the other persons blogs that interests them, comment, reblog etc…
But most of all say thanks then spread some loving kindness and peace and joy.

Social network right 😉

May all your days be filled with genuine joy and happiness, thank you to all of you for helping me towards my journey of achieving the attitude of gratitude and peace and harmony within.

Namaste, Stuart.

Related articles:

Neurobiology Underlying Fibromyalgia Symptoms

Review Article

Neurobiology Underlying Fibromyalgia Symptoms

1Alan Edwards Centre for Research on Pain, McGill University, 3640 University Street, Room M19, Montreal, QC, H2A 1C1, Canada
2Department of Neurology & Neurosurgery, McGill University, 3640 University Street, Room M19, Montreal, QC, H2A 1C1, Canada
3Department of Anesthesia, McGill University, 3640 University Street, Room M19, Montreal, QC, H2A 1C1, Canada
4Center for Neurosensory Disorders, University of North Carolina, CB No. 7280, 3330 Thurston Building, Chapel Hill, NC 27599, USA

Received 27 April 2011; Accepted 23 August 2011

Academic Editor: Muhammad B. Yunus

Copyright © 2012 Marta Ceko et al. This is an open access article distributed under the Creative Commons Attribution License, which permits unrestricted use, distribution, and reproduction in any medium, provided the original work is properly cited.

Abstract

Fibromyalgia is characterized by chronic widespread pain, clinical symptoms that include cognitive and sleep disturbances, and other abnormalities such as increased sensitivity to painful stimuli, increased sensitivity to multiple sensory modalities, and altered pain modulatory mechanisms. Here we relate experimental findings of fibromyalgia symptoms to anatomical and functional brain changes. Neuroimaging studies show augmented sensory processing in pain-related areas, which, together with gray matter decreases and neurochemical abnormalities in areas related to pain modulation, supports the psychophysical evidence of altered pain perception and inhibition. Gray matter decreases in areas related to emotional decision making and working memory suggest that cognitive disturbances could be related to brain alterations. Altered levels of neurotransmitters involved in sleep regulation link disordered sleep to neurochemical abnormalities. Thus, current evidence supports the view that at least some fibromyalgia symptoms are associated with brain dysfunctions or alterations, giving the long-held “it is all in your head” view of the disorder a new meaning.

1. Introduction

In order to examine the neurobiology underlying the symptoms of fibromyalgia, we must first determine what those symptoms are. Until recently, fibromyalgia (FM) was diagnosed based on the ARC1990 criteria [1], which were widespread pain in combination with tenderness at 11 or more of 18 specific tender point sites. The provisional ACR 2010 FM diagnostic criteria [2], suggested as an alternative method of diagnosing FM, do not require the presence of tenderness, but rather include a list of several other symptoms, including fatigue, unrefreshing sleep, and cognitive symptoms, as well as a mix of some other symptoms that could include headache, depression, and lower abdominal pain/cramping. The hallmark symptom is still widespread pain, and a diagnosis of fibromyalgia requires this symptom. However, a patient must also have some of the other symptoms that are common among FM patients in order to reach a composite score that would lead to a diagnosis of FM. In addition to clinical symptoms that make up the diagnosis of FM, experimental studies have identified a number of other abnormalities in FM patients, including increased sensitivity to multiple types of painful stimuli, increased sensitivity to other sensory modalities, and alterations in pain modulatory mechanisms. Further, neuroimaging studies have found functional, anatomical, and neurochemical differences in the brains of FM patients compared to healthy control subjects. Most of the clinical symptoms associated with FM have not been systematically studied in the experimental setting, but there are a number of studies that have provided an objective evaluation of the altered cognitive functioning and sleep disturbances reported in FM patients. Thus, this paper will focus on the experimental evidence related to FM symptoms and connect these perceptual and cognitive signs to abnormalities observed in the brains of FM patients.

1.1. Altered Pain Perception in FM Patients

The hallmark symptom of FM is widespread ongoing musculoskeletal pain. In addition, FM patients have been distinguished from other patients with widespread pain syndromes primarily by the presence of tenderness that has been assessed clinically by finding pain evoked by 4 kg manual pressure in at least 11 of 18 defined tender points. This tender point concept was not based on an understanding of the underlying pathophysiology, but rather on empirical observation. Thus, although the ARC-90 diagnostic criteria provided an important uniform tool for defining the FM syndrome, they did not validate the tender point concept, due to the circular evidence on which the criteria were based [3]. In fact, much evidence indicates that tender points are just sites normally more sensitive to pressure pain in all individuals [47] and that FM patients have an increased pressure sensitivity at non-tender-point sites as well [8]. Accumulating evidence now shows that FM patients have increased sensitivity to many types of painful stimulation, including pressure at non-tender-point sites [9], heat and cold pain [6,1014], electrical stimulation [6], and intramuscular hypertonic saline injection [15]. Despite the plethora of evidence for hypersensitivity to painful stimuli, there is less evidence that FM patients are more sensitive to innocuous somatosensory stimuli. Detection thresholds for tactile and electrical stimuli are not altered in FM [61213], but Hollins et al. [16] found that FM patients rated innocuous pressure as more intense than did healthy controls, although the effects in the innocuous range were weaker than in the noxious range. The evidence for changes in cool or warm detection also is mixed, with most investigators finding no differences between FM and controls for heat [610] or cold [1012], whereas one study found FM patients to have reduced heat detection thresholds [12], and one study found patients to have reduced cold detection thresholds [6]. Thus, it appears that the altered sensitivity within the somatosensory system is more profound in the noxious range than in the innocuous range.

1.2. Evidence for Generalized Hypersensitivity to Unpleasant Stimuli

The hypersensitivity of FM patients to painful stimuli has led some investigators to propose that fibromyalgia involves a hypervigilance to pain and pain-associated information [1719]. However, there is now evidence that the hypersensitivity to unpleasant stimuli extends beyond the somatosensory system, which has led to the hypothesis that there is a generalized hypervigilance for sensory stimuli in FM [162021]. A few studies have examined the sensitivity of FM patients in modalities other than pain and found perceptual amplification. FM patients have been shown to have decreased tolerance of unpleasant noise [20] and increased sensitivity to loud unpleasant auditory stimuli that parallels their increased pressure pain sensitivity [22]. Similarly, FM patients perceive unpleasant olfactory stimuli to be more intense and more unpleasant than do matched control subjects [23]. On the other hand, when pleasant odors were tested, FM patients and controls perceived the odors as equally intense, consistent with another evidence that the hypersensitivity across perceptual modalities may be confined to stimuli in the unpleasant range [24]. Nevertheless, for pleasant odors, although FM patients did not rate them as more intense, they did evaluate the pleasant odors as less pleasant than did control subjects. Further, a range of auditory stimuli were rated as more intense by FM patients than by controls, and auditory stimuli rated as mildly pleasant by healthy subjects were rated as somewhat unpleasant by FM patients [16]. The finding of hypersensitivity in multiple modalities of stimulation, particularly for unpleasant stimuli, suggests that the evoked pain sensitivity of FM may be related to an altered hedonic appreciation for sensory stimuli, rather than to peripheral tissue abnormalities.

1.3. Other Phenomena Related to Altered Pain Perception

Other types of evidence from experimental pain studies in FM patients support the idea of a centrally mediated up-regulation of nociceptive activity in the CNS. A central pathophysiological process that appears to be disturbed in FM patients is the “windup” of central nociceptive processing of C-fibre input to the spinal cord, resulting in the perceptual phenomenon of temporal summation of pain. Windup of nociceptive activity is dependent on activation of the NMDA receptor complex in the spinal cord by input from C-nociceptors [2526]. Some FM patients show increased temporal summation of pain and increased aftersensations at the termination of noxious stimulation [27]. These enhanced responses could be related to one or more of several possible factors: (1) an ongoing peripheral source of input from C nociceptors other than the applied stimulus; (2) sensitized NMDA receptors on central nociceptive neurons; (3) abnormalities in descending modulation; (4) abnormal processing at supraspinal levels. Evidence of increased sensitivity in multiple sensory modalities suggests that ongoing C-nociceptor input cannot alone account for FM symptoms, indicating that there probably also are either sensitized NMDA receptors, abnormalities in modulatory systems in the brain, or abnormal sensory processing at spinal or supraspinal levels. Increased sensitivity has been demonstrated at the spinal level in FM [11]. Staud et al. [28] showed that an NMDA inhibitor reduced temporal summation in both healthy people and FM patients, suggesting that NMDA receptors probably are not sensitized in FM. On the other hand, experimental evidence shows that there are abnormalities in pain modulatory systems in FM patients that could account for altered temporal summation and other putative spinal effects.

1.4. Altered Pain Inhibition in FM Patients

For hundreds of years, clinicians have known that pain inhibits pain, a phenomenon termed “counterirritation.” More recently, a physiological basis of this phenomenon has been identified; the application of noxious stimulation activates an endogenous analgesic system involving supraspinal descending control of dorsal horn nociceptive activity. This system is termed “diffuse noxious inhibitory control” or DNIC and its physiological basis in the spinal cord has been studied extensively in anesthetized animals [2930]. Nevertheless, when competing noxious stimuli are presented in conscious humans, other systems that modulate pain, such as distraction, also are probably in effect, so that care must be taken in inferring that perceptual effects are due to DNIC. Accordingly, a group of interested researchers has suggested that the term “conditioned pain modulation” be used in humans studies to avoid the mechanistic implication [31]. Studies that have examined conditioned pain modulation in FM patients show that conditioning stimuli that produce an analgesic response to experimental pain stimuli in healthy control subjects fail to have an effect on FM patients [133234]. One of these studies controlled for the effects of distraction and habituation and found a similar lack of conditioned pain modulation in FM patients [33], suggesting the possibility that the DNIC system is in fact impaired in these individuals. Alternatively, DNIC and other descending inhibitory systems could be activated by the widespread pain of FM, and the failure to demonstrate DNIC in FM could represent a ceiling effect in which these activated systems cannot be further engaged by the experimental manipulations [8]. In addition, distraction can have a powerful pain-inhibiting effect [3539], and some researchers have suggested that FM patients have altered attentional focusing, with a hypervigilance to unpleasant stimuli (see discussion above).

2. Other Symptoms of FM

2.1. Altered Cognitive Function in FM Patients

In addition to pain, many patients with fibromyalgia complain of problems with memory and concentration, often referred to as “fibrofog” [4043]. This clinical symptom has received a large amount of experimental study, and studies using objective cognitive tests substantiate patients’ subjective reports of cognitive dysfunctions, most commonly related to speed of information processing, attention, and memory [4356]. The most robust deficits in tests of memory and attention have so far been observed in paradigms involving a prominent distraction from a competing source of information, wherein FM patients are less capable than healthy controls to retain new information when rehearsal is prevented by a distraction [495057]. Milder deficits have been observed in memory free of distraction at encoding [43444849515859]. FM patients frequently display greater impairments in the ability to actively retrieve past episodic events in the absence of a cue (free recall) than on recognition tests, which serve to evaluate the retrieval of remembered information and are more resistant to the effects of impaired attention and concentration [43444851]. It has thus been proposed that memory impairments in FM are more highly related to attentional factors that modulate the efficiency of memory functioning than to primary memory processes per se [486061]. Thus, the inability to manage distraction seems to be a particular problem in fibromyalgia patients and is reflected in patients’ reports of difficulty concentrating and dealing with complex, rapidly changing environments [61] and by memory tests showing performance decrements in the presence of distraction. Impaired cognitive performance is evident even after controlling for anxiety and depression and the influence of medications that might affect cognitive functioning [43505258]. Another area of cognitive functioning that has been shown to be abnormal in FM is that of emotional decision making [6263]. A similar deficit has been shown in chronic back pain patients, suggesting that this is not unique to FM [64].

2.2. Sleep Disturbances in FM Patients

Many FM patients complain of unrefreshed sleep. Several laboratory studies using objective measures of sleep physiology such as EEG substantiate these reports by showing disordered sleep architecture in FM patients, including delayed onset to sleep, altered sleep stage dynamics, and reduced slow wave sleep (deep sleep) and rapid-eye movement (REM) sleep [6568]. The intrusion of EEG frequencies characteristic of wakefulness (alpha waves) in the deep non-REM sleep (delta waves) seems to be a prominent feature of the nonrestorative sleep of FM patients [656971]. Further, patients with FM often have fragmented sleep resulting from periodic intrusions such as involuntary limb movements (restless legs), sleep apnea, and arousal disturbances [687274]. Although FM patients tend to report greater disturbances in sleep duration and quality than shown in laboratory studies, and their subjective reports correlate better with the severity of clinical symptoms [75], objectively measured sleep disturbances have been associated with pain and subjective daily sleepiness in several studies [6768,7173].

3. Brain Changes That Could Underlie Symptoms

3.1. Neural Basis of Pain Amplification and Altered Pain Modulation

Functional brain imaging studies support psychophysical findings of increased pain perception in FM, in that there is an augmentation of sensory processing throughout pain-related brain regions [97681]. This is important, since laboratory findings of increased sensitivity could be interpreted as a reporting bias, rather than evidence of increased activation in pain pathways. The functional imaging studies have found that fibromyalgia patients show significantly more activity in response to pressure and thermal stimuli compared to controls in a number of brain regions. Increased activations were observed not only in limbic structures, but also in brain regions involved in sensory-discriminative processing, such as primary and secondary somatosensory cortices, which supports the view that neural responses to afferent signals are amplified in fibromyalgia.

Although the increased pain-evoked brain activations corroborate patients’ reports, the correlation between increased brain activity and increased pain perception does not explain how the afferent signal is amplified. As discussed above, there is psychophysical evidence of dysfunctions in pain modulation as well as pain perception. There is now much evidence that the activation of descending control circuitry is involved in pain modulation and that this circuitry includes parts of prefrontal, cingulate, and insular cortices [2336378283]. A number of anatomical imaging studies in FM patients reveal decreased brain gray matter in these regions [8490]. Although the cellular basis of decreased gray matter in FM patients is not known, it is possible that due to neuronal loss, decreased dendritic arborisation, or changes in glial activation, pain inhibitory systems do not work in FM patients as well as in healthy individuals.

Consistent with the idea that pain modulatory systems may be disturbed in fibromyalgia are data showing that some FM patients have abnormalities in neurochemical systems involved in pain control, including the forebrain opioid and dopamine systems. A positron emission tomography (PET) competitive binding study using the D2/D3 receptor antagonist [11C] raclopride showed that striatal dopamine is released in response to painful muscle stimulation in healthy subjects, but not in FM patients [1591], which might partially explain the increased sensitivity of FM patients to the painful muscle stimulation. For the opioid system, investigators using PET found that FM patients had decreased binding potentials at rest for the exogenously administered 𝜇-opioid receptor agonist carfentanil in several brain areas, including the ventral striatum, the anterior cingulate cortex, and the amygdala [92]. These areas are implicated in pain and its emotional modulation, and correspondingly, the binding potentials showed a negative relationship with the magnitude of affective pain scores relative to the sensory scores. Although results of this study do not tell us whether levels of endogenous opioids were increased or whether receptor availability was decreased, the findings support the notion that disturbances in the opioidergic system might be related to the increased pain sensitivity in fibromyalgia. For both dopamine and opioids, the ongoing widespread pain of FM could lead to a tonic activation within these systems and thus be a main factor in altering receptor availability and associated responsiveness to externally applied painful stimuli.

3.2. Neural Basis of Cognitive Symptoms

It is well known that cognitive capabilities such as attention and memory functions decline continuously across the adult lifespan [93], which, together with findings of accelerated age-related decline of brain gray matter observed in FM patients [84], suggests that there may be a relationship between gray matter reductions in FM and cognitive deficits in these patients. Two recent studies have linked FM to impaired emotional decision making [6263]. Anatomical imaging studies have reported that FM patients have decreased gray matter in the medial prefrontal and insular cortices [848589], areas implicated in emotional decision making [9499]. Together, these data suggest a possible association between gray matter loss and emotional decision making in FM. One study has directly examined the relationship between performance on working memory tasks and gray matter in FM patients and found that an individual’s performance was positively correlated with gray matter values in medial frontal and anterior cingulate cortices, thereby providing direct evidence for an association between altered working memory and gray matter morphology in fibromyalgia [51]. Both of these brain regions, together with lateral premotor cortex, lateral prefrontal cortex, frontal poles, and posterior parietal cortex, are areas known to be related to working memory processes [100105]. In terms of the neurochemical abnormalities in FM discussed above, dopamine plays an important role for cognitive functioning. Multiple lines of evidence demonstrate the importance of mesocortical and striatal dopaminergic pathways in memory tasks, perceptual speed, and response inhibition (see [106] for review). Thus, there is an overlap between tasks in which fibromyalgia patients perform poorly and tasks that are related to dopamine functioning, suggesting that a dysfunctional dopamine system could contribute to the cognitive symptoms of fibromyalgia.

3.3. Neural Basis of Sleep Disturbances

While many studies have used EEG and related methods to show various aspects of disordered sleep physiology in FM patients, little is known about the neurobiology underlying these disturbances. Several neurotransmitters have been proposed to influence CNS hypersensitivity associated with sleep alterations. For example, inhibition of the CNS serotonin synthesis has been linked to insomnia and increased pain sensitivity [107]. Accordingly, in FM there is evidence for low serum and cerebrospinal fluid serotonin levels [108109]. Injecting amounts of substance P into the CNS of rats has been shown to reduce sleep efficiency, increasing latency to onset to sleep and provoking awakenings from sleep [110], and there is evidence for elevated cerebrospinal fluid levels of substance P in FM patients [111,112].

3.4. What Do the Psychophysical, Cognitive, and Neuroimaging Studies Tell Us about the Neurobiology Underlying FM Symptoms?

The wealth of experimental evidence showing that FM patients are hypersensitive to painful stimuli, as well as unpleasant stimuli from other sensory modalities, in conjunction with functional brain imaging data showing increased stimulus-evoked activation throughout nociceptive pathways, shows that the defining symptom of FM—increased pain—is in fact real and not just a response bias of the patients. The finding that perception is increased in multiple modalities speaks against the hypothesis that FM pain is due to an upregulation of peripheral nociceptive processes. Further, psychophysical evidence that descending modulatory systems are altered in FM patients supports the opposing idea that FM symptoms are at least in part caused by alterations in CNS processing of the pain signal, including a dysregulation of pain modulatory systems. Nevertheless, the apparent dysregulation within these systems could be caused and/or perpetuated by a tonic activation related to the presence of ongoing widespread pain, so that the systems are saturated and cannot regulate further in response to external stimuli.

Since similar descending control systems, including attentional and emotional regulatory circuitry, affect multiple sensory modalities [113119], a dysfunction (or saturation) in these systems could lead to the hypersensitivity in multiple sensory modalities. FM patients show reduced habituation to nonpainful tactile stimuli and increased cortical response to intense auditory stimuli, both of which have been linked to deficient inhibition of incoming sensory stimuli [120121]. Also in support of the idea of a central dysregulation or saturation of pain modulation are changes in the opioid and dopamine neurotransmitter systems, both known to be involved in hedonic regulation [122].

Finally, the findings that FM patients not only perceive themselves to have altered memory and concentration (“fibrofog”), but also in fact perform poorly on multiple cognitive tests, even when depression is excluded as a contributing factor, suggest that there are alterations in brain function. The anatomical brain imaging studies that show reductions in gray matter in frontal regions important for cognitive function further indicate that this common symptom of FM is based on altered brain function. Together, the experimental evidence provides strong support for the idea that FM symptoms are related to dysfunctions in the central nervous system. The cause of these changes cannot be deduced from the available evidence, as it is correlational in nature. Did long-term ongoing pain cause the changes or did the changes cause the pain? Without a relevant animal model or long-term longitudinal studies, we cannot answer these questions. Nevertheless, we can at least say that fibromyalgia is real and that it is associated with multiple changes in the brain.

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Day Thirtyfour:

Alicia Keys – Love Is Blind

Got an answer today from the NLP people informing me that I have been accepted on their 2 day scholarship programme, I am eagerly awaiting full confirmation and instructions to get started.

I will travel to London in May for a two day training session, it should be enlightening, entertaining and teach me a lot, I have been tested more than any man could ever dream of lately and am coping remarkably well considering.

Shell and I have a property to look at within walking distance of our current home, we live in private rented accommodation at the moment and this means that will have a more permanent home that we can make ours, unpack the boxes, decorate and settle down.

I have worked on the proposal for The Venus Project and they have had a meeting via team speak on it, I am waiting for the minutes to be typed up and published. I could not make the online conference as I was doing my Daddy bit at the Mother-in-laws.

Shell took a pregnancy test today and it came up positive, although we are both really scared as we are in our 30’s we are tremendously excited about the prospect of having a new member in the family, I said to her a few days ago jokingly I bet your pregnant only to find out that she is.

She also did a digital test that says it is 99% accurate she is pregnant and 92% it was within 14 days, thankfully that takes her past her affair with Darren, she promises they used contraception and I pray that is true because if the child was his it would be an even more fucked up situation than it is now, it will take three months before we can get DNA tests done to confirm anything, but in my heart I am sure it’s a girl and she is mine, my lil Andromeda Hope is what we will name her.

Whatever happens I will stand by her.

Personally I am certain she conceived on our night of light on Day Twentyfour:.

I am having to do some serious re-framing today and positive thinking is the only way I am going to get through the next few months.
We do have to confirm it with the doctors tomorrow, after all the tests are not always right, but after her doing two tests I have to say she is, how exciting!

Going to clean up the kitchen now and set up to make some Turbos as Shell, I and the kids are going to try to have some family time together this evening.

I am going to have to completely quit smoking although I have managed to get rid of all the medications, and haven’t taken any since I began this journey, I have smoked especially over the last few weeks.

I am only on three or four at the most per day and they are mainly cannabis for pain relief, but now Shell is pregnant we will both have to quit and that is that.

Emeli Sande “Maybe (Acoustic)” HD. Angel Studio Session

This is something very very special, Thank you Emeli for singing so beautifully and giving me the inner strength to carry on each and every day that I hear your voice.

it’s currently 04:29 I could not sleep, my mind is quite clear although I am somewhat tearful, listened to Emeli and then watched a two hour NLP video.

Loving Kindness, Loving Kindness, Loving Kindness, Namaste.

Day Thirtythree:

Shell and I got up early and had breakfast together, it was lovely, albeit McDonald’s.
I tried to walk from Dans to her Mums and I made it, took us hours and we had to sit some but I eventually got there
It is Mothering Sunday and we spent most of the day around nanny Marys.

Babies make the world go around, holding Ella really made me feel special I had forgotten how much joy and love such a little thing can bring.

Guile

I trust you I hold you but you lie to my face.
You cut my skin from my bones.

The bleeding in my heart drips down to my toes.
The black rose, dies, dries, burns.
The seed of life withers in pain.

My eyes darken as deceit blinds me.
My tongue chastised by hate.
My soul entwined in wires.

The dirty dealings of cunning deceit.
Double-crossed by the trickster.
The cunning dissemblance, the sell out-of-body.

The sharp stab in the back.

By Stuart Otway-Smith

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Fibromyalgia Conference up date…. what you are missing if you have not already booked

This is your  last chance to book for the memorable  3rd annual Fibromyalgia Conference & Pamper Weekend, unless you arrive on our doorstep and we find you somewhere to hang out…

 
Hope to  see you at the Folly Pogs  Fibromyalgia Conference  April 6/9 2012 Easter weekend   at Chichester Park Hotel.
 
Great line up of speakers including the Godfather of Fibromyalgia Prof  Yunus and a  Canadian expert on fibro fog– very funny man.  Great comedian  booked too.  Up to the minute debate on benefits with two experts on Friday afternoon  – a real hot potato this  one…  just read inside the attachment  and I think you will sorry not to be part of this  conference. .It is all happening – the best yet.
 
Residential bookings  –   2 folk sharing twin bedroom  £179 per person  for  accommodation,  full board, conference, workshops, exercise & movement, entertainments and barrels of laughter & giggles. At less than £45 a day per person – the cost of a good dinner and wine…great value for money.  Twelve top presentations,  more  than 12 workshops, exercises and movements classes,  Olympic style challenges for fun,l ots of laughter,  talk to like minded people and make new friends – all on aid of research and we all want a cure!
 
The opportunity to make new fibro friends and to speaker one to one to these specialists – virtually a private consultation  at NO COST, what more could you ask for?
 
For him indoors  there is nearby  golf at Goodwood,  Portsmouth  tourist attractions, Submarine Museum, HMS Victory, Sea World, Chichester  Roman Baths,  Chichester Festival Theatre, lovely Cathedral., Planaterium,  you will be spoilt for choice.  In house pool (warm 30 c ) and gym.  We have ordered a heat wave   so it will be great.  Short trip to the seaside.
 
It is an opportunity not to be missed.  Any questions ring me or email Simon Stuart <fibcon2012bookings@gmail.com> – for a booking form  and news of what beds are left.  W are going to  learn a lot and have a lot of fun.
 
 
 
Hope to see you
FH
Jeanne
0844 887 2508
01243 674 447